Reflecting

So it’s New Years Eve. A natural time to think back on the year that just passed. And what a strange year!

2012 started with the husband (then boyfriend) on another continent. I had a lot of nears and dears around me to help me (mostly) hold it together. 2012 is, happily, ending with the husband back from a second separation, and again, I have a new batch of nears and dears to thanks for helping me through the past 4 months. There were some good times and some bad times during all 6 or so months that Q and I have been apart this past year. But I have never been more alone than I chose to make myself, thanks to the wonderful people who I’m lucky enough to call friends and family.

I rang in the last new year with a rowdy group of friends I’d known for some time. This year, I’ll ring in the new year with new friends, some of whom I’ll meet tonight, some of whom I’ve known for half the year.

I went from speaking no french to enough to get by in retail situations. And I intend to keep improving upon that.

I left too many people that I love dearly too far away during a huge move from Oklahoma to Northern Quebec. But I brought a lot of pretty great people much closer. And my darling “middle husband” came and passed a few weeks in this new land with me, helping me remember that “home” is a thought process and a feeling, and not a geographic location or a zip (postal) code.

I notice a theme as I look back. It’s no surprise. It’s “my people” who define my life, who lift me up when I’m low, who set the tone and the quality of my days, weeks, months, and years. I still miss my sis and my nephew. I still miss my mom and the many friends I have chosen as my family. But I am not sad. I miss them only because they are awesome people, and they have made indelible impressions on my life. I’ll take every melancholy moment and backward glance that experiencing such love and happiness is sure to bring. I know now, as a military wife, that the nears and dears who have helped me stay (mostly) sane through my 4 months alone in Quebec will someday be numbered among those I miss. Life brings changes, now more than ever, since I signed on for this wild ride with the husband.

But in reflecting on the choices I’ve made, the life I’m living, the memories I’m making…I’ll say it again. I wouldn’t change a thing.

Hello, 2013, you handsome bastard! I’m ready. Bring it on. Allons y!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s